Life is but a dream...

Monday, September 29, 2008

They Did The Right Thing

Matilda is going to get her inheritance after all. I'm glad Heath's family did the right thing. What's bothering is Heath's father, her grandfather saying they "gifted" the money to Matilda. Excuse me, Kim, wtf? She's his daughter! She has every right to that money. And she doesn't need you gifting a damn thing to her. I see now why Michelle was too through and didn't even bother fighting with them. When your daughter's grandfather has to gift her the money her father made, it's time to move the fuck on before you whoop somebody's ass.


Stop the Madness

I'm bout to get fired for real. I don't know what the hell is wrong with black women today. I'm all for if you got it, flaunt it. But this bitch is about to make me kick her ass for real.

First of all, 100% beef? What are you, a damn cow? How did you come up with the concept for that tat. Why in the hell do you have on spandex pants in the club? You didn't have anything better to wear? And your hood rat friends. Why in the hell do they have their faces on your ass like that?! I'm too through with this whole situation. I seriously have to stop going to You Know You Dead Azz Wrong! She's gonna get me fired, for real for real.

Lord Help Us

Ok, I seriously hate bytches like this. I am dying to be a mommy, and I know I'm going to be a damn good one. But we get bytches like this who adopts 3 kids, kills them, and puts them in her damn freezer. Why bitch, why? Them babies did not deserve this. But you, I hope they put yo ass in gen pop. Even hard core criminals don't like people who prey on kids.

The system completely failed those kids. Where was the social worker who was supposed to do routine checks? Where was the truancy officer when they missed school? And I still can't figure out why someone would give 3 kids to someone who looked like her crazy ass.

Lord, please save us. Some of us need more help than others.

Too Beautiful For Words

Oh Sanaa, how I love thee. You are a natural stunner. No implants or injections for you.

I'm being lazy today (and I'm supposed to working, I'm gonna mess around and get fired, lol), so click here for the rest of the pics.

Check Them Out

Everybody remembers the meltdown the country had when Janet Jackson's boob made a short appearance at the Superbowl. So what's gonna happen now that Survivor has aired footage with some dude's penis coming out of his boxers while he's running? For real, how the hell did the censors miss that?

*Sidenote: I think I might start watching Survivor. I suddenly have an irresistible urge to watch, lol.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Political Corner

McCain has decided to attend the debate. I wonder what changed his mind. Could it be the fact that so many people called him on his bullshyt? Whatever it was, I actually can't wait to see what he's got to say. I get bored easily by political debates, but I'm going to record this one so if do turn, I can watch it later. This is going to be good.


Supernatural Review

Are You There God? It's Me, Dean Winchester

Ok, let me say off top I am not at all feeling the vibe they are throwing this episode. Yes, I understand its necessary to lead the plot in the direction they want to go, but... I don't know. Maybe it will grow on me.

As you can tell from the title, this episode does a lot of talking about whether or not God (and angels) exist.

Now, I am not going to go into a full on scene by scene breakdown. For one thing, it's an hour long. On top of that, I told ya'll I'm not liking this 9 o'clock time slot. I was tired and cranky, so I don't exactly remember everything.

This episode had ghost of the people various hunters couldn't save attack them. Those who were unlucky enough to be killed by the ghost had their hearts ripped out through their rib cage. They did two close ups of two different bodies, and it was gruesome. Good job on not watering it done.

Bobby and his personal vengeful demons

Anyway, Dean ends up being confronted by Meg Masters. Only she doesn't look like the Meg we remember. Her vengeful ghost tells us this is the way she looked before the demon ambushed her and forced her to dress like a hooker.

Meg is pissed because she was inside her body the whole time, willing Dean to hear her, but of course he couldn't. After they expelled the demon using her body, and her family saw her in the morgue broken and dead, her baby sister who idolized her committed suicide. So now Meg is back to even the score. As Meg is spilling her guts, and coincidentally kicking Dean in his, Dean is truly and visibly remorseful he couldn't do more to save her. It was very touching and moving. Good job.

Anyway, we find out Bobby has a ghost proof panic room. It's 100% iron, and the walls are coated in salt. There is an opening in the ceiling and the light hitting the fan projects a Devil's Trap on the ground. Good job Bobby.

Blah blah blah, we find out all these ghosts are back because it's one of the seals of the Apocalypse, The Rising Of The Witnesses. Apparently, a very powerful demon has broken one of the seals to start the Apocalypse. And once all 66 seals are broken, Lucifer walks free.

We also find out, thanks to the vengeful spirit of Agent Hendrickson, when Lilith took out the police station after the Winchester's escaped, it wasn't in a blaze of white light, in the blink of an eye. Lilith took her sweet time, playing with them, for 45 minutes. Hendrickson was the last to die, so he got to watch the virgin get her skin peeled from her piece by piece. I'd be vengeful, too, if I had to watch that.

So, they free the spirits, yay for them. Of course, Sam doesn't use his freaky powers, which I was waiting for. Boo for you, Sam.

Then the angel visits Dean while Sam was sleeping. Of course he goes into this long rant about where were you and why doesn't God care and help, blah blah blah. Very irritating. But, we do learn it's Lilith opening the seals. Dun dun dun.

Sooooo..... I give this episode a B. There were moments I enjoyed, but for the most part it didn't captivate me. I hope next week's is better. And I'll probably be recording that and watching it Friday. Later, heffas!

Political Corner

Ok, by now ya'll know I am not real political savvy. But I feel the need to address the move pulled by McCain this week. I myself didn't understand exactly what was happening, so I had to ask some questions. The other day, Senator John McCain suspended his campaign and urged Obama to postpone the debate scheduled for today. Apparently, due to the financial ridiculousness that manifested itself Monday, McCain thought he he should go to DC immediately and help Congress decided if those companies should get the multi million dollar bail out plan proposed by our resident Idiot-In-Chief, George Dubbya. The response from Congress? "We don't need you. You don't even vote on anything that would make a difference."

Barack Obama has come out and said the American people need to know what their future President is going to do about this situation, and postponing the debate is not in the best interest of the American people. I completely agree. Not only that, the date McCain proposed to have the debate is the same day of the vice presidential debate. So, it seems like the Republican party is trying to shield Sarah Palin once again. McCain realized Obama's numbers were up and decided doing this debate was not in his best interest. The Republican party is trying to pull the okey doke on the American people. People, we can not have this man in office. Spread the word, make sure all your friends are registered to vote. The deadlines are approaching quickly. Do your part to get Obama in office.



Pirates of the Caribbean 4

The rumors are true, ya'll. There is going to be a Pirates 4! It has been confirmed Johnny Depp will be back to play Captain Jack Sparrow. Will and Elizabeth, however, are being written out. Nooooo! I am so not happy about this. Yes, I can do without Elizabeth kissing on my Orli, but Pirates with no Orli? What the hell, man! Yes, JD is scrumptious as Captain Jack Sparrow, but did you see Will with his shirt all open and his scar at the end of P3? *swoons* I'm going to go and pout now. In fact, I refuse to say anything else. If you want more details, hit the source link.


Thursday, September 25, 2008

What In The Hell?

Omg, I can't stop laughing, even though I know deep down this has got to SUCK! (Well, aint no sucking going on anymore! Hahahahaha!)

Ok, so this guy goes to the doctor to have a circumcision. When he wakes up, HIS ENTIRE PENIS IS GONE! The doctor found cancer and amputated the whole thing. So Mr. Philip Seaton is suing him because he "has suffered mental anguish, pain, and has lost the enjoyment of life." Uh, you think?

I am dying to know his exact train of thought. As he's coming out of the anesthesia, is he thinking, 'It's so cold in here my sausage has shriveled right up. Wait a minute. It's not that damn cold! Where the hell is my dick!' Did the doctor take just the dick and leave the balls? I mean, what in the hell? I knew men could get testicular cancer, but I've never heard of cancer of the penis. I feel sorry for the dude, but I just can't stop laughing! Maybe it's cuz I'm a woman, and can't comprehend the loss of a penis. If I was his wife, though, I'd be mad as hell!


Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Clay Aiken Is Out Da Closet

Hahahahahahaha. Hahahahaha. Excuse me let, let me catch my breath. Clay Aiken has come out of the closet. But that's not why I'm laughing. I'm laughing because he really thought no one knew. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Clay, boo boo, you weren't trapped in da closet. You were trapped in DENIAL! Hahahahaha. And your mother was shocked? Boo boo, she was shocked because you thought she didn't already know! Hahahahaha, this is too damn funny! Anyway, Clay, congrats for finally telling yourself da truth. Oh man, who knew you were a comedian, too? Oh, Clay, you slay me!

Political Corner

I got this in an e-mail and it's good info to share.


Please, please, please advise everyone you know
that they absolutely can NOT go to the polls wearing any Obama (or whoever you
are voting for) shirts, pins, hats, etc. It is AGAINST THE LAW and will be
grounds to have the polling officials to turn you away. This is considered
campaigning and no one can campaign within X amount of feet of the polls. They
are counting on us being overly excited and not being aware of this long
standing law that you can bet will be ENFORCED THIS YEAR!!!!!

They are banking that if you are turned away, you will not go home and
change your clothes and return to the polls to vote. Please just don't wear ANY
gear of any sorts to the polls! Please share this information with as many
people as you can. If you are already aware of this, please don't take it as
insulting your intelligence.
Have a great day and see you at the polls on
November 4th.

You better believe they are going to pull out all the stops to keep Obama out of office. Pass this info along to as many people as you can. And don't forget to vote.


What In The Hell?

I recently found a new blog totally devoted to clowning people who go out dressed like idiots and I love it. You Know You Dead Azz Wrong! has me laughing so damn hard my co-workers think I'm insane. But, it has brought something to my attention I can no longer ignore. Since when did it become ok to go to the club in body paint/ liquid latex??? I'm not sure which one it is, but what the hell man?!

I swear to God if I see one more heffa with a painted on shirt, Ima personally fly to their city and WHOOP THEY ASS! Bitch, this shyt is not cute! And you on the left, you didn't have to paint "HO" on yourself; trust me, boo boo, I bet they already knew. And if they didn't know, it was more than apparent when yo ass sat down in da corner and let some dude paint a shirt on you! I'm too through. I suggest we all band together to form Da Ho Patrol. Basically, we patrol the world to let bitches like this know, Sit Yo Ass Down, Ho! Who's with me?

Hump Day!!!

I know I've been slipping on my Hump Day posts, so here is one of my favorites: Jamie Foxx talking about meeting Prince. Enjoy, heffas!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Movie Review

So, Mr. D made up for being an idiot last week. You all know how much he hates Tyler Perry. So when The Family That Preys came out, I just knew he wouldn't take me. Hell, I even tried to get a date, remember? Well, I managed to forget about the movie. The county fair was last week. So Saturday morning, I'm like "Babe, maybe we should go to the fair." And he's like, "Ok, you finish breakfast, Ima run to the store and Ima bring you something back, too." So I finish breakfast, take a shower, and almost fall asleep in front of the TV waiting for him to come back. We eat, I twist his hair, and around 4 he's like, "Let's go to the fair". I'm thinkin, 'Oh, shyt, we're still going?' We get in the car, and he's like "I left the change in the center console. Can you get it for me?" I open and it and what do I see? Two tickets to Tyler Perry for the 4:10 show. The man is a sweetheart.

So, we're watching the previews, and Mr. D points out there are no action previews. It's mostly drama, the sappy stuff. In other words, he feels TP is setting women up to be sad. Shut up, Mr. D. You're spoiling it. But I love you anyway.

Now, I will not give away too much of the movie. But I have got to say it was FANTASTIC! Alfre Woodard and Kathy Bates do a wonderful job as two women from very different lifestyles that have managed to be the best of friends. It was completely believable and very moving. And even though I hate to admit it, TP, even with his mini fro and scruffy face, still manages to come off as effeminate. There, Mr. D, you happy? Tyler Perry is a tooty fruity.

Sanaa Lathan was AWESOME! I didn't really appreciate one of my favorite actresses play such a bitch, but she played the hell out of that role! From her very first scene, she was a bitch. How you gonna be talkin shyt about a woman payin for your entire damn wedding? And then at your reception, how you gonna be givin another man the googly eyes with your new husband standing next to you? And the poor dummy didn't even pick up on it. You dumb ass.

Sanaa Lathan as Andrea is a truly ruthless bitch. She is constantly putting her husband down and telling him he will never be William Cartwright, and the fool takes it. At one point she tells Ben (TP) the same thing, and he tells her, "Look here, I don't wanna be no damn William Cartwright!" And I'm like, 'It's about damn time somebody said it!'


Now, I in no way condone this, but bitch deserved it. So, Andrea and Chris are arguing in the family diner, in front of erbody and them, and Andrea is punking the hell out of him. Ben finally drops the bomb that errbody, and I do mean ERRBODY, but Chris knows Andrea is fuckin William Cartwright. So Chris is like, is this true? And she's like he's my man. And he says but we have a son. And SHE says, "My son is Cartwright." Chris turns his head away, then back hand slaps the bitch across a counter! I mean this bitch flew over the counter and onto the floor! She got hit harder than ol' girl in Family Reunion the movie, but trust me, even the white people in the theater was like "It's about damn time!" I mean, Andrea is really that much of a bitch.

I'm sorry, I really didn't want to give away too much, but damn! They built up to that perfectly, and you really don't expect Chris' soft ass to do that. However, it did bring up a topic of discussion for me and Mr. D. Andrea didn't respect her husband because she made more money than him. He had a respectable job, she just made more money. So the bitch started a 5 year affair with a man she felt was better and also used him to try and get to the top. And the stupid bitch thought he would leave his wife and child and marry her. Sistas, why do we constantly dog out perfectly good brothers and think the dude you are cheating with is going to wife you? He don't even respect you! Why do you think the only time you spend together is in the hotel room? Shyt like that turns good men into bitter men who no longer respect the rest of us because of your trifling ass.

Robin Givens is also in here and does a beautiful job as a sista who worked her way to the top instead of laying on her back like Andrea. She also put Andrea in her place, but of course the bitch is too full of herself to realize the truth Robin's character is spitting.

Anyway, I've given away too much already. I felt this movie broke away from Tyler's usual pattern, but of course Mr. D didn't. He did, however, admit he kinda liked it. Whatever. I give the movie an A+, and it's one I want to watch again. Oh, and yes, he did manage to fit a church scene in the chaos. The movie possibly could have done without, but it served a purpose. Go see the movie, heffas! You'll love it!

Oh, and since we didn't see it opening weekend, we didn't see the preview for Madea Goes To Jail, so for those of you who did, I DON'T LIKE YOU. Toodles!

Celebrity Women Have Gone Mad

Ok, I'm gonna have to ask the heffas of the world to STOP GOING AFTER NEW YORK'S LEFTOVERS!!!! What is wrong with you celebrity women? I know I gave J Hud a pass, even though I did slightly dog her, but only because she got Punk, and even I was drooling over him during I Love New York. I mean, the man is fiyone, even if some of ya'll think he's on the DL. But now, now Niecy Nash done gone and got herself engaged to Wood. My first question was who? I don't even remember no damn Wood on EITHER season. So, I hit up Wikipedia. Apparently, this mofo was the winner of Mr. Romance in 2005. Remember, that reality show with Fabio? Of course you don't. Neither do I. And you know why I don't remember him from ILNY? Because he was eliminated Season 1 Episode 1. So maybe, MAYBE Niecy Nash can get a pass because he never actually got a chance to tongue New York down. But damnit, if I hear of one more reality show reject hooking up with a real celeb (Mr Boston dating Punkin DOES NOT COUNT; two rejects dating each other is totally irrelevant), I am gonna start my own reality show called "Who Not To Date If Yo Ass Is Famous! Duh!"

Anyway, I guess I show offer my congrats, but I'm SERIOUSLY not feeling this dude. Couldn't she have picked a cute reject, like J Hud? But she's the one who has to look at this troll for the rest of her life, not me, so I say congrats. I just can't see him being a cover model, unless it's Troll Illustrated. Later, heffas!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Thank God Somebody's Got Balls!

Ok, I know I have been known to talk shyt about Detroit from time to time, but it's all in fun to get on my neighbor's nerves. That being said, I am nowhere near above calling out my own damn city and it's residents. And Kells has been pissing me off for a long time.

When that fool finally went to trial after years of getting it delayed, I wanted to move back to the Chi just so I could pull jury duty. And when they announced his acquittal on the radio, I damn near crashed my car. We all know R. Kelly is guilty. We saw the damn tape. We saw him answer when his name was called mid stroke. And the jury knew it, too. But because the damn girl was paid so well, they couldn't prove she was underage, and therefore could not convict him on child pornography charges. By the way, I heard he threw his acquittal celebration party at Chuck E. Cheese's on the South Side. I'm just sayin.

Anyway, on that day, I vowed to never buy another R. Kelly song, and change the channel every time one came on. The dj's of the world, however, made no such vow. So what, I can be my own damn army of 1.

Then Kells took his dumb ass on BET. Mistake #1. Most people would probably think Black Entertainment Television would be the perfect forum for his first interview since the trial. But we all know damn well what BET has become over the years. And for those of you who need a refresher, click here.

Then, when asked if he like teenage girls, instead of flat out saying no (which we all know is a lie), this golden shower lovin muthaf'er asks the interviewer to define teenager. Robert Kelly, what in the hell, man? Are you for real? Did the same person who wrote Sarah Palin's speech coach you here? That right there solidly reinforced my belief that he is a dirty pedophile.

And for the next couple of days, every radio station was blasting him because of that interview. But still, no one decided to stop playing him. And then we finally get DJ Flex standing up and refusing to endorse Kells anymore. This is the shyt I've been waiting for. R Kelly may be a musical genius, but he is a dirty, dirty man. I've got 14 year old cousins. 14 year olds shouldn't be having sex with each other, let alone some 40 year old man. And even though 19 is legal, I damn sure don't believe 19 is his starting age. Seriously, what does a 40 year old and a 19 year old talk about? I can barely talk to my sister that long, and I'm only 6 years older than her.

Anyway, R Kelly is nasty, and I hope parents will keep their kids away from him. I also hope radio stations will stop playing his shit. Like Flex said, the only reason he felt secure in doing this is because we keep supporting him and he got away with that bullshyt. SMDH

OMG, 100 already?

Obviously I have too much shyt going on in my head. This is my 100th post and I've only been blogging a little over a month, I think. Anyway, I decided to do something different for this post and let ya'll know more about me. Soooooo, here I go.

- On my mother's side, I am the oldest of 4 kids. I have 2 brothers and a sister.

- On my father's side, I am the oldest girl and the second oldest child. All together, my father has 11 kids (that we know of, lol).

- I have 3 middle names. The third one is simply M. (that period is on my birth certificate, swear to god)

- My niece's name starts with P, just like mine.

- I want to be a psychiatrist and open my own clinic specializing in military families and underprivileged kids.

- I love to write, especially poems. I think I just like having an audience without actually having to be in front of one.

- When I was in the Navy, I used to work on F/A-18C. I had to get on top of the planes to check for missing screws and stuff. I am so terrified of heights, the first 3 months I would crawl on my hands and knees on the wings. The people I worked with thought it was hilarious.

Ok, heffas, that's enough for now! Ooooh, just one more.

- I call people "heffa" cuz my mama used to tease me about being chubby when I was a kid. It hurt my feelings, so I took it and turned it into a positive thing, and I call my friends heffa instead of bitch, cuz I really didn't curse that much before I joined the Navy. It's a term of endearment.

Now you know more about me AND one of my favorite terms. Hope you enjoyed this peek into Miss P's life! If you wanna know more, just ask. I'm in a giving mood today. Later, heffas.

I Am SO Checking For J Hud's Album!

Ya'll already know I love the hell out of some J Hud. Hell, I even forgave her for dumping her long time boo to chase after New York's sloppy seconds, fine as he is. But I digress. Another song from her album has been leaked. Ya'll gotta check this shyt out. I am LOVIN her Chi town accent coming out strong in the phone convo intro. I am SO buying this album!

I'm His Only Woman- Jennifer Hudson featuring Fantasia

Supernatural Season Premiere

Ok, so Mr. D turned me on to Supernatural and I love it. We've spent the last 2 months catching up on season 1- 3 and finished just in time to watch the premiere last night. I am a Charmed fanatic, and this show isn't on the same level, but it is a nice replacement. And no, I am still not over Charmed ending. Anyway, the premiere last night was pretty good. And I am so proud of myself; I didn't spoil it for myself by looking it up on Wikipedia first.

First and foremost, I'm not feeling the new Supernatural sign. It might grow on me, though. Anyway, here we go.

So, at the end of Season 3, Lilith let the hell hounds loose on Dean and he was sent to hell. She tried to kill Sam, but for whatever reason, she couldn't. Last night, Dean awakens in his coffin, and climbs his way out. We have no idea how he got out, but he decides to go find Sam and Bobby.

Immediately I have an issue. Hunters don't bury their dead, they salt and burn them. The boys did this with their dad; the black chick with the English accent did this with her husband. So now I got the crooked eye going on.

(After watching 3 seasons on DVD, it was hard to go back to commercial breaks. But, we solved that by pressing pause on the DVR, fixing a plate of food, and from that point on we fast forwarded through commercials. Yay for technology!)

Fast forward a few scenes. Dean and Bobby track Sam down. A girl answers the door in her draws. Sammy comes into the room. Sammy is finally getting him some cooch! It's about damn time! And when the girl is leaving, he calls her by the wrong name, and she corrects him, and Sam is like, yeah, that's what I meant. Since when did Sam turn into Dean? Guess his habits finally rubbed off on Sam.

Almost forgot. Bobby explained why Dean was buried. Sam wanted him to have a body when he brought him back. Only problem was, Sam didn't bring him back. And Dean has a hand print burned into his shoulder. Ooooh, dun dun dun!

Omg, that was so funny when they got into the Impala and Sam had an IPod in there. The look on Dean's face was classic. And when that music started playing, and he was like "Really?" lmao

The scene where the physic's eyes burned out. That was nasty as hell. Enough said there.

When Sam walked into the diner and the guy was dead, Mr. D said it reminded him of the last diner when yellow eyes abducted Sam. Nope, yellow eyes is dead! Oh, Mr. D, when will you learn to leave the predictions to me?

I absolutely DO NOT like this new actress they have playing Ruby. I want the blond chick back!

New Ruby: I don't even like this heffa's VOICE

Bring back the old Ruby!

Now, I totally called it on this last scene. The bunker or whatever the hell it was, was completely covered in Devil's traps from every faith. When dude walked right over them, I knew right then and there he was an angel. And him being invincible to the silver knife clinched it way before he told Dean he was an angel and God decreed he be pulled from the pit cuz he had work to do.

Oh, and did ya'll peep Sam using his psychic powers to pull the demon out of that one girl? Sam has been playing with his powers! And lying to Dean all willy nilly. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Seriously, though, I wonder what else he's learned to do in the 4 months Dean was dead?

Overall, I was very satisfied with this episode. And the rumors are this season will clear up how their mother knew ol' yellow eyes. I can't wait for next week, but I hope they give it an earlier time slot. A bitch has got to get her beauty sleep!

Season 4 Episode 1, you get an A for a job well done. Later, heffas.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Just Listen

So last night, me and Mr. D were finishing season 3 of Supernatural so we would be all caught up for the season 4 premiere tonight. **If you don't know what happens at the end of season 3 and don't wanna know yet, STOP READING!**

Anyway, at the end, I'm sitting on the couch silently crying. He looks over at me, and he's like "Why are you crying?" He starts hugging me and keeps asking me that. So, I finally tell him cuz Dean died. Then he's all like you were just watching TV, it's just a TV show, wth? So I'm like, dude, I just spent 3 seasons watching Dean and Sam get closer as brothers, and now I just watched Sam watch his brother get killed, on the 17th AND it's the first day of my period! You better back up! I mean, come on now. Let's think about what we already know about me. I am, for lack of a better word, a crybaby. I cry at the sappy stuff. I cried when Mufasa died, and if I watched it again today, I'd probably STILL cry. I'm an over emotional Pisces. And when I realized my period was going to come on the 17th, I warned him I would be weepy.

I know men and women grieve in different ways. Yesterday was a very weepy day for me. I was crying as I posted that poem, which, by the way, is the poem I wrote for my mother's obituary. I cried when I watched the Mama video. And I cried when I forced myself to take my mother's picture off my computer's desktop background. It's only been 2 months, but damnit, I am doing my best to cope. So what if I cry every now and then? And I was silently crying; it's not like I threw myself on you and started bawling.

I'm not writing this just to vent. I wanna give people a little insight. Learning to deal with the death of a loved one is a difficult process. Everyone handles it differently. Mr. D and my mother weren't that close, but he was in the hospital room with me while I held her hand until she passed. It was hard for him to watch, but it was even harder to watch me. And I know he's having a hard time, and has no idea how to help me cope. So, I very rarely speak on it. But if you really wanna help someone who is grieving, listen. Just listen. Let them talk about whatever they wanna talk about. 20 times a day, I find myself remembering some small detail about my mother that makes me smile, and sharing it with someone really helps. It's not me trying to keep myself depressed; it's my way of keeping her memory alive. If that person needs to cry, offer them a tissue and your shoulder. Sometimes people, women especially, just need to cry.

Blogging helps me cope. I have been going back and forth; one minute I can accept her passing, the next I'm in denial. But with these posts I keep doing on my mother, I think I'm accepting it. It took me a month to tell people who didn't already know that she was gone. And even still, I found it hard to associate her with death, passing, etc. But it's getting a little easier with every word I write about her. And you know what? I haven't cried once while writing this post. I call that progress, don't you?

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

To My Mama

Broken Thoughts (Straight From the Heart)

They always say
No one will ever love you
like your mother
That must be because
there will never be another
like you.
The first beat we ever learned
was the rhythm of your heart.
The first sound we ever heard
was the twinkle of your laugh.
Your smile that lit the room,
your voice that calmed our fears.
You dried our tears
when we were sad.
You held us close
when we were scared,
cried tears of joy
when we came into our own.
That special way
you used to say "OKAY!"
You were our protector, teacher, mother
No one will replace you in our hearts
For as long as we have our memories
We're never far apart.

Go Hug Your Mama

Monday, September 15, 2008

J Hud Is Engaged To Punk

Now, ya'll know I got love for J Hud. And I also love the hell out of Punk. So when I heard the rumors of them dating, it didn't bother me, but I also didn't believe it. I just chalked it up to two Chicagoans who have recently found fame and built a friendship around it. When Jen hit the scene, she had a boyfriend from the Chi and they had been dating since high school. But now, everyone is saying Jen and Punk are engaged, he proposed to her on her 27th birthday. What happened to the hometown boyfriend? I was rooting for them. I was hoping she wouldn't drop him after the Oscar. Guess that was silly of me, huh? Anyway, if this is true, I hope they can make it work. Everybody deserves love. And Punk is so damn swole! Look at all those fucking muscles! And he is a Harvard grad, a freaking lawyer. I never could figure out what the hell he was doing chasing after New York. Ooooooohhhhhhh, I just wanna lay on his chest! Lawd have mercy! They make a hot couple. But J Hud is lucky, cuz if I had met him first, he'd be like 'J who?'
**UPDATE** Click here for J Hud's new single Pocketbook ft Ludacris.

Now I know this video is kinda off topic, but thinkin bout I Love New York and contestants from Chicago reminded me of this and it STILL cracks me up!

OMG, after this show, my girl was in the club and Pootie was hitting on her but she didn't know who the hell he was and wouldn't give him no play. So when he walked away, her friends were like, 'Girl, that's Pootie!' And she was like 'Pootie Tang?' 'No, Pootie who went crazy on I Love New York and threw himself down the stairs! He crazy girl!' So when she told me I sent her this video, and she was like 'I'm SO glad I blew him off!'

Friday, September 12, 2008

That's Gotta Be A BIG Tattoo!

Did ya'll hear Serena Williams got Common's name tattooed on her ass? That's a lot of territory to cover! I'm not hatin, I got a Serena size booty my damn self, so I know it's gotta be big to be seen. But then again, I'm not sure I believe this. Serena is just as famous for her derriere as she is for her tennis. Plus, a tat is pretty much permanent. I mean, who wants to have laser surgery removal on their ass? So why would you put a tat on it you might regret later? I love Mr. D to death, but in order for me to even consider, we would def have to be married first, and that's only for me to consider it. What do ya'll think?

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Remembering September 11th

It has been 7 years since the September 11th attacks. So many people's lives were irrevocably changed that day. I was sitting in the MEPS station in Chicago waiting to go to boot camp, when they turned the TV's to the news. We all watched in horror as the towers fell. They then quietly got up and locked the doors. They didn't want all the kids from Chicago running to take a train back to the city. Everyone going to Navy boot camp was hastily sworn in, while all the other branches were taken back to the hotel since all flights had been canceled and there was no way for them to get to their bases. As I took my oath, I was scared out of my mind. Were we at war? Were there any survivors from the attacks? Were they gonna start attacking major cities? My whole family was in Chicago. I was completely freaking out.

My first day of boot camp I met 10 people who were from New York, and 2 with family members who worked in the Towers. One poor girl received word her father hadn't made it. In the wake of September 11, when we all thought it was a terrorist attack, seeing the pain of those affected, being afraid for my family, I never once questioned my decision to complete boot camp. I wanted justice for those families, for each and every American devastated by this tragedy.

We have all been lied to over the past 7 years. And we were lied to once again March 19, 2003 when Bush used the Sept 11 attacks as a basis to go to war. So many lives were lost that day. Take a moment today to remember those we lost on that day.

What In The Hell?

People now-a-days are fucking crazy. Did ya'll hear about the principal who made his students look into a bag of human feces and urine? That is fucking disgusting. He said he was trying to prove a point because someone had been pissin and shittin on the floor and seats in the girl's bathroom. Now see, I can understand him being mad, I can understand the janitor being mad, too. That is some nasty and trifling shit. But he went too damn far. Everytime I read about some school official doing something crazy like this, it makes me wanna home school my kids, when I have them, of course. This is too nasty for words. Ewwwwww!


Who Really Cares, But

Larissa, aka Bootz, aka that loud, stank ass, obnoxious bitch from both Flavor of Love 2 and Charm School is supposedly 3 months pregnant and not married. Now, why do I bring up the lack of a husband? Well, because the whole reason Flav let her stank ass go is because she told him she was staying celibant until marriage. At the time, I thought to myself, 'liar, but good for you if it is true.' I did have a nagging thought at the back of my head though. I thought to myself maybe, just maybe, she couldn't stomach the thought of letting Flav's nasty ass hit it. And with this so-called "confirmed" pregnancy (supposedly she posted it on her Myspace), I am totally convinced she just didn't want Flav in her shyt. I mean, really, if I was a dude and I saw you on TV all on Flav's dick, there would be no way in hell I would date you or fuck you. So maybe she was trying to ensure she could get some future dick, even though I still wouldn't smash cuz I saw her stick her tongue down his throat. That was absolutely nauseating. But, whatever, Bootz is pregnant. And I repeat again, who cares?

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

What's In Your Drink?

So, I was cruising the web and and found the list of the 20 most unhealthy drinks. I am now going to write all this down, so check it out yourself by clicking I Ain't Drinking That!

And while you're at it, click You Tricky Bastards to find out what your favorite restaurants are hiding from you.

Political Corner

I am not going to go real deep into this, but most polls are reporting a drop in Obama's numbers and a rise in McCain's every since McCain picked a woman for his running mate and Obama didn't. I said it before, and I'll say it again. It was a brilliant political strategy by an evil bastard out of touch with the American people. Now, that being said, not only am I extremely offended, but I am also fucking pissed off that Republicans think women are so fucking stupid and naive that we will be so upset Clinton isn't on the ticket we will jump on the McCain train. I know these "polls" are saying that is just the case, but really, where the fuck do they get their data from? I know I haven't been polled. I'm guessing those of you reading this haven't been polled either. I mean, come on, it was never about the Vice President. It has always been about the President, and Obama is still going to be President. Besides, I don't think I trust Ol' Pantsuit as VP, anyway. She might have "conveniently" arranged for BO to be in a fatal accident. No no no, we need to keep her ass as far away from the ticket as possible.

But let's just say some women Democrats have jumped ship just because McCain put a woman on the ticket. Are you heffas really that blind? dumb? easily manipulated? He's using you! Man, woman, or chimp on his ticket; black, white, or polka dotted, he is still the same McCain who is pretty much an older, crustier carbon copy of George Dubbya! I mean, come on now. You jumped ship cuz Hilary aint his VP pick. Excuse me, but didn't Hilary come out and endorse Obama? Do you really think when Hilary goes into that booth in November she's gonna be all 'I'll show him. Don't wanna pick me as VP, huh? Well I'm voting for McCain. Take that Obama!' No, you stupid bitches! She's not going to do that to her country, so why the hell are you? Are you really so hell bent on giving Republicans another 8 years to fuck up our country even worse than it already is just because there is a woman on their ticket? You are just as bad as the Republicans. Even Republicans know McCain is the worst Republican candidate in a long ass time! And I found this one blog that said exactly that, was written by a Republican, and added that the only reason they are supporting him is to keep a black man out of office! Look at the politics, people! Sarah Palin does not support sex education in schools and she also does not support a woman's right to choose. That alone doesn't scare you? McCain supported how many of Bush's policies? And even after we've lost so many soldiers, sailors, and marines on foreign soil, sent so many back broken and torn, ravaged American families far and wide, are you really gonna vote for them just because his VP is a woman? Really, people? Really? I am too through.

Hump Day!!!

It's hump day, heffas! And my job has been fuckin me all damn week! And I couldn't upload the video I wanted, so now I'm pissed. This is the only video that would work for me, so this is what you get. Later, heffas.

Usher VI On The Way?

So, have ya'll heard Usher and Tameka aka Jelly Belly are separated? I haven't really paid that much attention to the rumors cuz people have been saying that FOREVER. But now there are reports saying the couple is expecting their second child together. Lil Cinco aint even 1 yet. It kills me when women get pregnant before their child can reach their first birthday. If the rumors are true, I don't really believe the break up rumors cuz obviously they stay doing the dew and even though separated couples do still sometimes sleep together, most don't. Then again, Ursh did just rehire his mama, and we all know the drama that was reported between Tameka and Mama Ursh, so maybe him and wifey are on the outs. I was actually starting to root for them, though. He seemed like he really did love her, although he was getting on my damn nerves defending it to everyone. You aint gotta explain why you married the crazy lady! Just do you boo. Fuck everybody else. Anywho, congrats on the new baby. That's like, what baby #10 for Tameka?


Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Check Them Out

Political Roundup... Concrete Loop

Remember Your First Time?... Blogxilla

Can't Hardly Wait

Tyler Perry's new movie The Family That Prey's opens officially in theaters Friday. I can't wait to see this. However, if you've been paying attention, you know Mr. D hates TP with a passion. Oh yeah. Before I forget, Mr. D also feels his views weren't accurately portrayed in that post, so since I luv my boo so much, Ima write another post entirely from his POV. But I digress. My wifey in training, Sanaaa Latham is in this movie, so I HAVEto see it. That being said, I need a date, people. Mr. D has absolutely refused to go. Any takers?

Lil Nahla....

is too damn cute. That girl know she got some good genes. They are a good looking family. Halle got lucky, though. You know two good lookin people sometimes produce a fugly ass kid. But not this time. I can't wait to see her tear up Hollyweird with Z and Shihloh16 years from now. You know they are gonna be some wild ass teens.

Minnie Driver Gives Birth To Baby Boy

Congratulations to new mom Minnie Driver. She gave birth to a healthy baby boy, Henry Story Driver. I love me some Minnie, every since I saw her and Chris O'Donnell in Circle of Friends. Damn, I suddenly feel old. Anyway, congrats Minnie!


Monday, September 8, 2008

Comedy Corner

Jamie Foxx is freaking hilarious. Have you seen his stand up routines? Anyway, this episode of Foxxhole Radio has Jamie taking cracks at Sarah Palin and Republicans in general. Click here to listen.

In The Name Of Lil Mama... What The Hell???

I finally have a reason to use the phrase I picked up from F.U.! In the name of Lil Mama, why in the hell did Fatman Scoop take his ass to the VMA's dressed like this?

Seriously, dude, what the hell were you thinking posing on the red carpet dressed like this? And your wife gets a slap for letting you out the house. I'm too through.

From My Mind To You

So, I was over at one of my favorite blogs,The F$%k It List, and she asked a question: Is it wrong to not like an 8 and 2 year old? That reminded me of my ordeal with my neighbors. Around June, Mr. D and I bought a ferret. And since it's all nice and warm in Southern Maryland, we also bought a BBQ grill. So, we're walking the ferret, and two little neighbor girls ask if they can play with her. Mr. D being the sweetie pie he is, says sure. Little V is about 10 and Little M is about 8. So, these girls start knocking on the door errdae. I let it slide, let Mr. D deal with it. Then comes the day when we decide to grill. Miss Detroit (the next door neighbor), is sitting with us and I'm making daiquiris. Tell me why these little girls attack Mr. D while he's checking the grill and ask for hot dogs??? Both me and Miss Detroit say hell naw. But Mr. D gives them both hot dogs. Do you know these little heffas had the nerve to come back and ask for some kool-aid? By this point, Miss Detroit is going off. Did I forget to mention she doesn't like kids, despite having an 8 year old? Yeah, the only kid she likes is her own. Anyway, Mr. D gives them both my damn Hawaiian Punch. I was too through. And then these little heffas left half a hot dog in a napkin next to the door, and left my cup on a bench. When we told them to throw the hot dog away, they said they were gonna eat it. Ewwwwww! From that point on, I officially did not like that 8 and 10 year old.

But I aint done yet. Little V gets a hamster. Yay for her, right? So one day me, Mr. D and Miss Detroit are chilling waiting for Mr. Detroit so we can play cards and get our drink on. He comes in the house talking bout they dun killed the damn hamster and are outside burying it. How the hell did they kill the hamster? Little M tossed it up and then moved out of the way, letting it hit the ground and snap its neck! And then they asked everyone who walked past (me, Mr. D and Mr. Detroit) to say a few words over the hamster. AND they chased Mr. D with the damn dead hamster! And got pissed when I said aint no way in hell Ima let ya'll play with my ferret, you freaking hamster killers! They had the nerve to call me mean and rude. Those little girls need a good ass whopping. And the foolishness doesn't end there. But I'll leave that for another post. To conclude, parents, please spank your kids BEFORE they turn into little monsters who chase people around the complex with dead hamsters! This has been a public service announcement by Miss P.

What In The Hell?

I am totally convinced people have gone insane. An upstate NY woman pleaded guilty to stashing a sawed off shotgun in her baby's stroller. Really, lady? She was arrested when she got into on the street with some other woman. She told police her aunt was holding the baby at the time of the altercation. But at some point the baby was in the stroller with a SHOTGUN. Lady, what in the hell? Was it really that freaking serious? What the hell is wrong with you, putting your a gun in the stroller with your baby. SMDH.


Thursday, September 4, 2008

Check Them Out

Dirty KK was laughing as he took his plea deal... Glennisha Morgan

Sarah Palin... Bossip

Are You A Freak Or Just A Plain Hoe?... Blogxilla

Political Corner

Politics just seem to keep drawing me in. I haven't been watching the RNC, but I might search for the videos on CNN. Anyway, for those of you either undecided or just want to hear both sides of the story, Yahoo News ran an article fact checking some of the Republicans claims. Sorry it's so long, but I thought it was interesting.

PALIN: "I have protected the taxpayers by vetoing wasteful spending ... and championed reform to end the abuses of earmark spending by Congress. I told the Congress 'thanks but no thanks' for that Bridge to Nowhere."

THE FACTS: As mayor of Wasilla, Palin hired a lobbyist and traveled to Washington annually to support earmarks for the town totaling $27 million. In her two years as governor, Alaska has requested nearly $750 million in special federal spending, by far the largest per-capita request in the nation. While Palin notes she rejected plans to build a $398 million bridge from Ketchikan to an island with 50 residents and an airport, that opposition came only after the plan was ridiculed nationally as a "bridge to nowhere."

PALIN: "There is much to like and admire about our opponent. But listening to him speak, it's easy to forget that this is a man who has authored two memoirs but not a single major law or reform — not even in the state senate."

THE FACTS: Compared to McCain and his two decades in the Senate, Obama does have a more meager record. But he has worked with Republicans to pass legislation that expanded efforts to intercept illegal shipments of weapons of mass destruction and to help destroy conventional weapons stockpiles. The legislation became law last year. To demean that accomplishment would be to also demean the work of Republican Sen. Richard Lugar of Indiana, a respected foreign policy voice in the Senate. In Illinois, he was the leader on two big, contentious measures in Illinois: studying racial profiling by police and requiring recordings of interrogations in potential death penalty cases. He also successfully co-sponsored major ethics reform legislation.

PALIN: "The Democratic nominee for president supports plans to raise income taxes, raise payroll taxes, raise investment income taxes, raise the death tax, raise business taxes, and increase the tax burden on the American people by hundreds of billions of dollars."

THE FACTS: The Tax Policy Center, a think tank run jointly by the Brookings Institution and the Urban Institute, concluded that Obama's plan would increase after-tax income for middle-income taxpayers by about 5 percent by 2012, or nearly $2,200 annually. McCain's plan, which cuts taxes across all income levels, would raise after tax-income for middle-income taxpayers by 3 percent, the center concluded.
Obama would provide $80 billion in tax breaks, mainly for poor workers and the elderly, including tripling the Earned Income Tax Credit for minimum-wage workers and higher credits for larger families.
He also would raise income taxes, capital gains and dividend taxes on the wealthiest. He would raise payroll taxes on taxpayers with incomes above $250,000, and he would raise corporate taxes. Small businesses that make more than $250,000 a year would see taxes rise.

MCCAIN: "She's been governor of our largest state, in charge of 20 percent of America's energy supply ... She's responsible for 20 percent of the nation's energy supply. I'm entertained by the comparison and I hope we can keep making that comparison that running a political campaign is somehow comparable to being the executive of the largest state in America," he said in an interview with ABC News' Charles Gibson.

THE FACTS: McCain's phrasing exaggerates both claims. Palin is governor of a state that ranks second nationally in crude oil production, but she's no more "responsible" for that resource than President Bush was when he was governor of Texas, another oil-producing state. In fact, her primary power is the ability to tax oil, which she did in concert with the Alaska Legislature. And where Alaska is the largest state in America, McCain could as easily have called it the 47th largest state — by population.

MCCAIN: "She's the commander of the Alaska National Guard. ... She has been in charge, and she has had national security as one of her primary responsibilities," he said on ABC.

THE FACTS: While governors are in charge of their state guard units, that authority ends whenever those units are called to actual military service. When guard units are deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan, for example, they assume those duties under "federal status," which means they report to the Defense Department, not their governors. Alaska's national guard units have a total of about 4,200 personnel, among the smallest of state guard organizations.

FORMER ARKANSAS GOV. MIKE HUCKABEE: Palin "got more votes running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska than Joe Biden got running for president of the United States."

THE FACTS: A whopper. Palin got 616 votes in the 1996 mayor's election, and got 909 in her 1999 re-election race, for a total of 1,525. Biden dropped out of the race after the Iowa caucuses, but he still got 76,165 votes in 23 states and the District of Columbia where he was on the ballot during the 2008 presidential primaries.

FORMER MASSACHUSETTS GOV. MITT ROMNEY: "We need change, all right — change from a liberal Washington to a conservative Washington! We have a prescription for every American who wants change in Washington — throw out the big-government liberals, and elect John McCain and Sarah Palin."

THE FACTS: A Back-to-the-Future moment. George W. Bush, a conservative Republican, has been president for nearly eight years. And until last year, Republicans controlled Congress. Only since January 2007 have Democrats have been in charge of the House and Senate.

Dirty KK Better Not Drop The Soap!

I probably shouldn't be so gleeful about this, but KK is going to jail! You know what? Fuck it. I am happy. That dirty dog doesn't deserve to be in charge of anybody's city, except maybe OZ. He gives black politicians a bad name. Anyway, KK pleaded guilty to 2 felony obstruction charges. He is going to serve 4 months in prison and get 5 years probation. He also has to pay $1 million in restitution.

He is gonna have to be in solitary for his own protection. I mean, I know Dirty K is a big dude, but do you know how many dudes in the pokey are ready to poke KK? If a gang of them ran up on him in the shower, they could probably take him. Then again, they might send him to a country club prison like they did with Martha Stewart. I suggest all the citizens of Detroit who still have love for their convict mayor send him some soap on a rope. Ha!


Watch This

America's Next Top Model

When reality TV first premiered, I hated it. For the most part, I still do. However, over the years I have slowly been pulled in. And I fell for Tyra's ploy for ratings and tuned it to see Isis be fierce. I only caught the 1st hour of the 2 hour premiere, but I've got plenty to say. Forgive me if I jump around a lot.

First of all, I am not feeling this whole future vibe they were trying to do. Did you see the computer they were inputting the girls info into? It looked like some prop from a 70's movie about the future. Hell, it could have been in Back to the Future. And speaking of inputting info, what the hell was up with the body scans? And if it was really scanning their bodies, how come Isis' extra equipment didn't show up?

Now the Jay's. What in the hell was up with the matching platinum do's? I can get used to Mr. Jay like that (maybe), but Miss J, no boo boo. Your ass is too dark to make it work. Please go back to the drawing board and try again.

And did you see the Asian girl, Sheena I think, do her turn on the catwalk and unzip her jacket? What the hell for? Don't you know the Jay's don't want nothing you got girl? Isis has a better chance of hooking up than you. But I still like Sheena. I hope she stays for a while, even though I probably won't be watching.

Back on the future trip. Everybody and they mama knew that wasn't no damn Tyra bot when that door opened. It was so obvious she was in there. I really didn't appreciate ol' girl (I forget her name, the black girl with the glasses) pretending she was shocked and RuPauled. Speaking of her, I was glad she didn't make the cut cuz she was hating hard on Isis. You don't know her, bitch! So why the hell you hating? I guess you hatin from home now, cuz she's in and you're not!

There are 3 Brittney's this time. Goddamn!

And is it just me or is Lauren kind of funny looking?

Anyway, that's just my take. If you want a full re-cap, I bet F.U. will have one by the end of the day. And if you want to see pics of all the girls who made the cut, click here.

Oh, and Isis did one hell of a tuck job! I think I recorded it, so Ima watch it and give my review of the second half tomorrow. Later, heffas!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Hump Day!!!

Hey heffas! Do you know what day it is? That's right, it's hump day! And here is you hump day video. I know, it's not as much hump talk in this video, but hey, I tried. I hope you appreciate it heffas.

Political Corner

Ok, people, it's time for real talk. I was browsing Bossip, and I ran across this.
I seriously don't know how I feel about this. I know I've only been able to vote for the past 7 years, but I remember details about every election since George Bush Sr. Remember "read my lips"? Anyway, I can't remember any other election when the Presidential candidates were featured on so many magazines, gossip and political in nature alike. Maybe their goal is to get to the younger generation. Maybe they are honestly trying to get people to know the candidates while they wait in line at the grocery store. But something about this just does not sit right with me. I feel the candidates should be in magazines with some weight. Did you know Barack was on SNL the other day? I mean, come on. Maybe my thinking is a little old fashioned, but you know he's got to be losing some credibility with the older voters. And seriously, why in the hell would Palin go to Ok! magazine to clear up the issues everyone is worried about? Am I by myself on this one? What do you guys think?

Ne-Yo Getting Paid Ya'll!

So, remember when R. Kelly, aka the Pied Pisser kicked Ne-Yo off of his tour because the audience liked him more? Well, a judge has ruled that Ne-Yo is entitled to $700K because of it. I'm sorry, but did that tour even make that much money? Probably not after they kicked Ne-Yo off. This doesn't really interest me, but I needed a reason to ask this question: how old is Ne-Yo? Wikipedia lists him as 25, but on the radio today they reported him as 44. Now, this is not the first time I've heard rumors of Ne-Yo, whose real name is Shaffer Smith, being ridiculously old. Does anybody know for sure?


I'd Give Da Business To...

Last week I realized I have not been showing "dark butts" the love and adoration they deserve. When I mentioned this to Mr. D, I was shocked and RuPauled (yea, ya'll got me saying it too. damn you F.U. and F$%k It List!) because he pointed out that some of my favorite women are deliciously dark skinned. So, today here is my all chocolate rendition of I'd Give Da Business To. Enjoy, heffas.

Gabrielle Union
Oh my god. Her freaking dimples drive me INSANE. I love me the hell out of some Gabby. She is the bitch you love to hate, and I do love you boo boo. She is an official card carrying member of my wifey club.

Sanaa Latham
She is absolutely scrumptious. She hasn't quite graduated to wifey status, but she can still get da business.

Taye Diggs

I know I am not the only one who wanted to wipe Taye Diggs down during the pool scene in How Stella Got Her Groove Back. That water glistening on his gorgeous chocolate skin, and then he smiled, omg, I melted into my damn seat. You can definitely get the business.

Stacy Dash

This is one bad bitch. Her eyes, her voice, her body. Did you know she's over 40 with 3 kids? She puts these young bucks to shame. She is a REAL woman, and a certified member of my wifey club.

I vow to never again exclude the dark and lovelies from my list. Forgive me?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Amy Winno Dun Actually Smoked Her Brains Out

Everybody and they mama called it, but this dumb bitch just wouldn't listen. Amy Winno smoked for like 36 hours straight. She smoked so much, she's given herself brain damage. Damn, Amy. He tried to make you go to rehab, and your ass said no, no, no. Now your ass won't be saying nothing cuz you done fucked up your brain for real for real!

All jokes aside, this is such a waste. Amy is so talented, but she just couldn't put the pipe down. She should have been talking to Whitney Houston. We all know Ms. Houston was high as a kite for 14 years, but she managed to keep her voice and her brain intact, albeit slightly downgraded. How? Cuz crack is wack! She made too much money in her career to ever have to smoke crack. Hahahaha! Oh, I cracks me up.

For real, though, remember when Amy looked like this?

Now look at this poor, stupid heffa. What in the hell was she smoking for her face to look like that? Please, put the pipe down Amy, and let your daddy send you to rehab. Maybe Jamie Spears needs to be called in. Hell, he saved Britney from becoming Amy, maybe he can save Amy from herself.

Lord Help Us

I remember when this woman was arrested. China Arnold has finally been found guilty of microwaving her infant daughter to death. This bitch killed her baby because she was afraid her boyfriend would get mad when he found out the baby wasn't his. A baby that she pushed out of her cooter. Carried for 9 months, fed and bathed, and she put her in a microwave. I can't stand women like this. Why didn't something click in her brain telling her to take her baby out of the fucking microwave? I just cannot believe this. I am so pissed right now. China faces the death penalty. Take a minute out of your day and say a prayer for Paris Talley, an innocent child who not only died too young, but also suffered a horrible death by the hands of the woman who should have loved her the most. RIP, little Paris.


Dirty KK update

Ok, so I have been hearing various stories about Dirty KK. I have been trying to find a credible source with all of the info in one place, but that don't seem to be happening. Anyway, a judge has ruled the Governor of Michigan can hold her hearing to determine if KK should be stripped of his office. I also read reports that KK has agreed to a plea deal, terms which include him leaving office, not running for two years, paying a fine, community service, blah blah blah. Now, you all know how I feel about that old dirty dog. Those text messages between him and Beatty proved his guilt to me. But I don't know how I feel about the Governor removing him from office before his trial is done. He is an elected official. The good people of Detroit (hahahaha, I couldn't type that with a straight face. chi-town, bitches!) put him in office and I don't think he should leave unless he is removed after a guilty verdict or he steps down willingly. What do ya'll think?

What In The Hell?

I don't even know where to start on this one. Those Republicans must really think people are fucking stupid. I mean really, did McCain even interview this bitch he plucked out of thin air? First, they say Sarah Palin's daughter is the real mother of her Palin's infant child. Then they say the 17-year-old is pregnant, but is going to marry the 18-year-old father. And on top of that, she's pulling a Dirty KK and pressured the police commissioner to fire her ex brother-in-law. Now, I understand everyone has problems in their families, but is this something McCain really wants to address on the campaign trail? I wanna know what his screening process was. Apparently, they had only spoken once before he called her and offered her the VP nomination, and both of those conversations were extremely short. Is that all it takes to be second-in-command of this country. If it is, watch out heffas, Ima put my name on somebody's ticket. Everybody write me in on the ticket in November. Vice President P!
Ok, I know Barack did the noble thing and said kids should be off limit when it comes to discussing the election, but wtf? You HAVE to go over to Bossip to look at the pics of Sarah Palin's 17-year-old drinking her ass off. I know I should be the last person to talk about being a wild ass teenager (I did my share of dirt, lol), but I co-sign with Bossip. When yo mama is a politician, the freaking GOVERNOR of a state, you should know better than to take pictures like this. I predict Palin declining the nomination. Dude, just look at the pictures.